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Review Body Weapon a.k.a. Yuen chi mo hei (1999): Absolutely not worth your time!

genre: action, crime, thriller

All this time I was under the impression Body Weapon was a title trying to cash in on the success of Naked Killer. How could I not?  I mean, you have this hot woman with a gun in a leather suit and a hot guy ready to kick ass. Sure, I would have to contend with the same infantile comedic shenanigans and even more childish eroticism but the action at least would be top-notch right? Or at least close to it. Then I saw Wong Jing's name pop in the opening credits as the producer. My hesitations were completely gone. 

For like three minutes. Probably less. Because then you get to witness one of the most terrible rape / torture scenes put on the screen. I get that the idea is to confront you how awful rape is. But did it really need to be so lengthy. It was like they were having fun humiliating the actors involved. Especially the woman. Naturally, you would think that the officers in charge would do everything in their power to catch the criminals responsible. Wrong! For whatever reason, Body Weapon decides to become a romcom about this triangle relationship (Vincent Zhao, Angie Cheung and Stephen Au Kam-Tong). They seem more concerned with their love life than apprehending bad guys. Zhao's character even has to get himself prepared for some Kung fu tournament. His coach played by Elvis Tsui is so into this tournament and Zhao that he wants to dedicate most of his time to them. 

Then out of the blue the police captain decides that Angie Cheung's character is perceived as a slut and that she needs to marry one of the two officers otherwise she will be fired. One could argue whether it's wise for police people to be involved with each other, and I am sure there are some rules concerning this. Still, what people do personally is their business. A police captain shouldn't meddle with such affairs in the first place. But Siu -Ling follows orders and very quickly decides to marry Sam Lee. We get to witness their honeymoon night and another atrocious event with very tragic consequences. Things are too much for Siu-Ling and decides to take the law in her own hands. How does she take on her thirst for revenge? She seeks out a trainer who can teach her a thing or two about cracking nuts. Does it surprise you that this trainer is gay?

There is some decent fighting in the film, but I honestly didn't care about any of the fights or events in general. Had the film been a serious affair and the cops competent, then perhaps I would have been compelled. I was even prepared to be bombarded with offensive but funny jokes. None of that here. It's like you are supposed to take everything seriously and at the same time embrace the silliness. Other Wong Jing productions also have the tendency to go off the rails, but at least they remain to be entertaining. With this, I didn't have fun at all. 

Absolutely not worth your time!

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