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Review Goal of the Dead (2014): Like a football match in the World Cup deciding who will be third place!

genre: comedy, horror, action

Goal of the Dead is split into two halves like a football match. Seeing how there are two directors that might explain it. Otherwise I really don't get why they chose to spread the little they had for over two hours.

The movie went on and on and on and the end was nowhere near. With so many sure ingredients you simply could not go wrong and yet that is exactly what happened. The guy who brought us The Horde and Antigang lets us down big time. The first half takes it sweet time to set the mood and the scenery. For a while it looked like they were trying to make a real effort into making it a feelgood sports movie where they would let it go to hell in the second half. But it never really does this and the effort is limited to a speech by coach Coubert. Which is one of the funniest moments BTW. Sure there are a few enjoyable action sequences. Only they don't last that long and aren't that many of them. Every time when you thought that they would let things get more thrilling and intense they would slow events down with dialogue that can hardly be called funny. I was not expecting high quality comedy. I would have settled for the easy jokes. But apparently that was never meant to be. Then they put in sub plots that really could have made the dynamics between the characters so much more interesting. Sam Lorit (played by Alban Lenoir) who is a true comedic talent is forced to play the straight guy and you can see him struggling to keep it calm and cool. Here is someone who could literally change any boring scene into a funny or exciting one and he has to tone down god knows why? It almost seemed like that directors Benjamin Rocher and Thierry Poiraud are out of their depth and weren't sure what they were going for. They probably were winging it and then at one point decided it end the project. They did not even bother giving us a climax. The ending was incredibly poor as it does very little and it makes you wonder why you even bothered investing your time. 

I never ever have asked for a refund for a poorly made film. Had I planned to see this in the cinema I surely would have demanded my money back and then some extra for punitive damages. Don't watch this ever. For a film supposed to be about zombies there aren't that many too be enjoyed. The few times you can enjoy them they will have left your screen within a blink of an eye. You are better of watching Antigang. 

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