If I could, I would have avoided this review, but for completion’s sake, I decided to power through. And let me tell you. That was harder than you think. For one thing, I couldn't do this in one sitting. I had to nap and come back for a second time.
After my nap, I told myself to let go of all the expectations and then go with what this film was trying to convey. The goal of course is to introduce the world to Madame Web. I know her from the comics. But in those, she was an old blind lady who at one time crosses paths with Spider-Man. And then helps him from then on. Clearly, this film is intended as an origin film. And honestly, that is not such a bad idea if it weren't for the other elements. Like the three Spider-Women to be and the villain of the story, Ezekiel Sims. I know nothing of these characters. But they do appear in the comics and all of them have a pretty compelling origin story. But for whatever reason they are just thrown into the mix and presented as girl bosses who aren't really bosses yet.
Ezekiel Sims, from what I have read, is not a classic villain. He even mentors Spider-Man. So why they have chosen him to be this flat villain, is beyond me. Couldn't they have taken someone else from the roster? In any case, I have given more thought about the characters and the story than the filmmakers did because for the most part, this is like a chase film without the action and excitement to back it up. There is one thing that was cool, when Cassandra finally taps into her powers.
But one moment doesn't make up for the cringe and agony the film puts you through. I am aware that Madame Web is called the worst of the Spider-Verse films, and I have to agree with this notion. This film does a very poor job of drawing you in and make you invested. It actually doesn't tell a story. It's almost like many stand-alone scenes put together. None of the characters have real dialogues. It's actually real hard to root for any of the characters, since they aren't that likeable. I don't even understand why they chose Dakota Johnson to be part of this. She never looks like she wants to be there. I could have forgiven all of this had the film at least offered some nice action and spectacle. You get the most generic things you can find in those crime shows on streaming services. Just a waste of your time.
Ultimately, that is what Madame Web is. It had potential. But they squandered it. A gigantic waste of your time!
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